Are my parenting days over, for the foreseeable future I feel so
Here’s the kicker I think it’s my own fault or maybe our Australian/New Zealand culture (one for all and all for one) I want one of those cultures where you take your parents to live with you or build them a granny flat attached to your home. Well maybe not now but in the future at least, so you know it’s available.
Is there a new phase after the children have left home? Aside from a retirement village, I think someone needs to develop empty nest syndrome courses. Oh that’s right they do it’s called therapy!
Do I have to wait till they have children, before I’m retrieved from the bottom of the toy box and have some further use? How dare they have busy lives and stuff that occupies them like partners, homes, jobs and sport.
Last weeks news about a missing mum, which had me reflecting on motherhood
Husbands body found down a desolated mine shaft, and mum is MIA, disappeared without a trace, a family nightmare, so many possibilities, so many assumptions can be and will be made.
I’m thinking what horribleness something has gone wrong for this couple, in the outback pursuing their passion for gold prospecting a journey of their own to follow a hobby a passion something for them, a couple of empty nesters.
Not giving much thought about that story till you see those that are affected, their children left behind grieving, now parent less for the time being possibly orphaned, very heart breaking those youngsters pleading for information on the news.
Stopped me in my tracks and gave me time to reflect on our own lives
There was a time that I would have not been very far from my daughters side or thoughts for that matter but the tide is turning as is natural and as it should be.
I have become surplus to requirements, I was once horrified at parents who travelled the world and didn’t give a thought to leaving their children behind and now I finally get it.
I apologise for all those thoughts as now it is my turn, sorry it took me so long
Beam me up Scotty, where can I escape to as I am not embracing this empty nest syndrome at all, my arms aren’t long enough, my pride is bruised. I’m not ready or grown up enough and I haven’t found my big girl pants and am whinging away to anyone that will listen. So avoid me at all costs please (kidding send hugs my way and tell me to shut up that it will be alright in the end).
What shall I fit into this new life of forced freedom,
abandonment, see clearly I have issues, I’m not done yet.
- Book club
- Book launches
- Ride a bicycle
- Yoga (I hate yoga)
All of the above I am truly interested in and some I am invested in, also scrabble and cards is on my wish list as no one will play those with me (wonder why). I am also afraid if I go somewhere to pursue cards and scrabble they will laugh at me and that I will be the youngest person there (desperate).
Here’s a thought, am I still a contributor to society now that my parenting skills are nearing an end, (before the next journey starts) when before too much longer the tide will be turned and they will be caring for us, one can only hope that they will oblige.
I’m hearing that saying , be nice to your children as they will be the ones choosing your nursing home blah blah blah blah
As I see it we have a variety of options open to us to survive this infectious syndrome, I know I’m not alone.
- Jump on that fast moving freeway and join in at 100 km an hour
- Or plod along doing the same thing day in day out till we fall off our
I stupidly cry for what has been, could have been, now lost and beyond ones reach and fearing what is to come.
My friends cannot believe I have been stumped, left flightless, all fight has been sucked out of me, my insides empty, gone, left in a crumpled heap, barren and hollow and am instead opting for flight.
Life and times of a parent at the other end of the cycle and yes I am grateful that I have two beautiful children and wouldn’t have it any other way.
Clearly they are happy well adjusted and independent so I know I have done something right, just wishing I could adjust a bit easier and it has been well over a year. So wishing they lived closer, I grieve for those of you who feel the same and when your children don’t even live in the same state, I selfishly couldn’t cope with that.
I want it back, but alas no it’s not going to happen, our babies have grown, you may think it’s not going to happen and I don’t want to be the bearer of bad news. One of those pain in the arse mothers who put their two bobs worth of advice in when and where its not wanted.
On a side note I hope those children find their mum, it’s a very strange story.
Everyone needs a mum and not all are lucky enough to have one
Treasure every moment, hang onto your sanity and live for yourself as well as your family unlike I who lived for her children.
You only have one opportunity, unfortunately you can’t go back, never was a truer word said echoing in my head is.
‘If only I’d known then what I know now’